This post was written by my good friend, Cheri Britton, from BoomThinking.com and author of BOOM Thinking: The Gutsy Guide for Breaking Out of Old Mindsets. She has a remarkably entertaining writing style…one that grabs you by the arms and pulls you forward until you recognize yourself in her words. I hope you enjoy it – and learn from it – as much as I did!

 

When You Can’t Shift and It’s Time To Get Off the Pot: Lessons I’ve learned from my Mini-Van

Cheri Britton, www.BoomThinking.com

 

 

I’ve just had to replace my transmission.  That meant that I was forced to come up with some moola AND stay home for 3 days.  HURRAH!  I could slow down and do some of that “inner work” and self-care that I’d been meaning to.  The good news?  It only cost me $4289.39!  I hope that you get the sarcasm here.

 

The truth is my van’s transmission was not the only thing that was slipping out of gear.  For a long time now, I have been running in too high a gear and have been WAY PAST DUE for an overhaul myself.  Not only have I been physically going at speeds that were tearing down my engine, but I was facing some enormous emotions too.  I have been vacillating between immobilizing fear and heart-pounding overwhelm, with periodic bursts of fruitful work sprinkled inbetween.  I’ve known for some time that I’ve been due for “some time up on blocks to take a look at my own engine.” 

 

Well, sometimes circumstances have a strange and magical way of making us face what we have been trying hard to avoid.  

 

As I sat in the waiting room of the repair shop contemplating the dent that this new transmission was going to put in my bank account AND feeling stranded with no auto to boot, I felt, on a deep, deep level, that this was a wake-up call. 

So, in that moment, I surrendered.

 

Well, actually that’s a lie.  In that moment I sobbed and wrung my hands and had a gigantic pity party!

 

But slowly I began to wake up to what was really happening.  I reached out to friends for support.  I began to consider that this was my opportunity to really take that much needed look under my own hood.  To do some assessment of those fears that had been making me sputter.  To give myself a tune-up. 

 

It was an awkward, uncoordinated and slightly pathetic surrender…but I surrendered.

 

So the next day I pulled out my “tool box” (my piles of Self-Help books and journals), flopped down on my comfy bed and started to “work”.  I’d read a while, journal, cry, read some more, make a new sign for my wall, and cry some more.

 

I’d stop every now an then to watch a movie or putz around on the Internet, but I just kept returning to the bed.  I’d pick up a book and magically turn to a phrase or chapter that reminded me that I could make anything happen that I put my mind to.  I was reminded that the health of the roots predicts the health of the fruit.  My roots had been malnourished for a while.

 

As I lay there, smack-dab in my fear, no longer rushing to push through it or minimize it, my phone rang with work (and money).  As I held myself through my worries about money and being single and feeling alone, people called to hire me as their coach.

 

Specically I received word that I would be speaking at the NC Conference for Women in Jan 2009 (something I really wanted) and 2 people signed up for my SOUL-opreneur Series…that very day.  It was like God was rewarding me for taking time for myself. 

 

Okay, write this down…it’s quite profound.  Avoiding the hard stuff doesn’t make it go away.  Just like pretending that there is plenty of gas in your car when your on empty doesn’t allow you to go farther.  No Duh!

 

The health of your roots really do determine the quality of your fruits. 

 

Now don’t get me wrong.  I didn’t like writing a check for $4.289.39.  But I’m thankful I had it.  And I’m not jumping up and down to do more days of deep inner work.  But I’m thankful for the lesson and most thankful that I got it this time.